Alternative Lyrics to "La Donna E Mobile"
These very silly lyrics are inspired by a recent Voyager episode, "Tinker, Tenor, Doctor, Spy," where the Doctor sang the following lyrics when Tuvok (a Vulcan) started going nuts in the audience:
Tuvok, I
understand,
You are a Vulcan man.
You have just been without
For seven years...about.
Harmones are raging,
Synapses blazing!
It's all so veeeeeeeerrrrryyyyyy illogical.
And so now I offer my own versions. After all, we all make them up, don't we?
The Early Morning DJ Song
(to be sung on Saturdays at 9 AM)
La Donna
Mobile,
Next morning is Sunday.
I will just stay in bed,
You'll hear "Stage and Screen" instead.
I will be so happy!
As I take my nap-py!
It sounds so looooovveeeellyyyyy I need PJ's coffee now.
The English Teacher Song
(to be sung on the way to class)
La Donna
Mobile,
They need a quiz today.
Sighing and suffering,
Pleading and blubbering,
They'll reveal their laziness!
Partying causes haziness!
Maybe the neexxxxtttt time they'll read the book!
The Pseudo-Linguist Song
(to be sung when your ego needs stroking)
La Donna
Mobile,
I-ay eak-spay ig-pay atin-Lay!
Onderful-way ith-way y-may ongue-tay,
If-ay ay-may ay-say.
Ust-jay atch-way e-may!
Asp-gay and-ay oan-may!
I-ay am-ay o-say aaaaalllllteeennnttted-tay iss-kay y-may eet-fay!!
The Incredibly Busy Person Song
(to be sung while doing too many projects)
La Donna
Mobile,
I don't get enough pay.
For doing this all day,
I should be a millionaire, eh?
Time rushes past on my clocks!
There's too much in my "In" box!
I need some heeeellllppppp here or I'll lose my mind!
The Drinking Song
(just take a guess when you sing this one)
La Donna
Mobile,
I need a beer, I say!
Fancy beers, I've had 'em.
Give me Samuel Addams.
Oh, don't get pissed off!
It's not a twist-off!
You'll need an oooooppppeennnneeerrrr to get your drink!
Chat Show Host Song
(from Gabriel)
La Donna
Mobile
Where is my script today?
I accept no excuse.
Just watch me blow a fuse.
As a Question Master
Ad lib spells disaster
Guessing what to aaaaaaaask is an impossible task!
The Lazy Person Song
La Donna
Mobile
Yoga's just too hard today:
Stretching and bending
Kvetching unending.
Jogging sounds like torture!
My muscles sense a scortcher!
It makes me feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel bad just lying here!