10. Instead of a cap and gown, they give you a McDonald's hairnet.
9. Your final paper in English was titled "TV Guide: Gateway to Viewing Pleasure."
8. Grandma starts affectionately calling you "Lil' Flunkie."
7. Nobody believes pot in your locker was planted by those Whitewater dudes."
6. Your computer teacher discovers your gettin' it on with a laptop.
5. At oral exam, you respond to every question with, "Hey -- I ain't in Mensa, you know!"
4. Your guidance counselor gives you Dr. Kevorkian's number.
3. You constantly neglect your studies to date Woody Allen.
2. Your name: Kenny. This year's prom theme: "Sorry you won't be graduating, Kenny."
1. Your combined score on the SAT: 12